The Amicable Divorce: A Mythical Creature?

Bigfoot. The Loch Ness Monster. Amicable Divorce. All three are the stuff of legend. In the case of amicable divorce, though, the legend may actually be true. More couples claim to have seen an amicable divorce than either Bigfoot or "Nessie." Humor aside, amicable divorce, a divorce in which both spouses cooperate towards a mutually satisfying resolution, is far from a mythic creature.

Under ideal circumstances, couples can have a divorce that is uncontested and is devoid of courtroom drama. To make their divorce run smoothly, a couple can intelligently assess the realities of their situation, approach the end of their marriage as mature adults, and come to agreement on all the various issues that need to be addressed, all by themselves. Yes, that can be done. Complete agreement before anything is done is unnecessary; indeed, that is a rare bird. What is needed, however, is a willingness and a commitment on the part of both spouses to the process of cooperation and resolution. The couple does not have to agree on every part of their divorce settlement from the very start. For example, spouses may find the handling of child custody or the way in which a particular asset is to be divided a sticking point. Or, there may be nuances of the law that require a more sophisticated understanding of the law. In instances such as these it is reasonable for the parties to seek the assistance of a trained family law attorney or mediator who can help them work through those troubling spots together.

Couples who are considering a divorce should be willing to treat each other with the respect and understanding they shared when they first were drawn to each other if they want to ensure that the failure of their marriage remains confined to just that: the dissolution of their marriage, and the event does not spill over emotionally, financially and psychologically into the rest of their lives, as that dynamic can be a crushing blow, both emotionally and financially, to everyone involved, even the children. If you are thinking of divorce, or are even in the middle of one and you want to try to resolve things amicably, feel free to call the attorneys at Feinberg & Waller for a consultation and assessment of your situation.

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