Madonna and recent ex-husband Guy Ritchie were seen out in London today with their kids at London’s Kabbalah Center. You will recall that these two celebrities seemed to enjoy an amicable separation and divorce and appear to be trying to provide “normal” experiences with their children as co-parents, divorce notwithstanding. This effort by them to provide a “normal” holiday season for their children is underscored, but not overcome by the tension that continues to exist between them since they have yet to decide where the children will live (Madonna wants New York and Guy prefers London). A solid basis such as the ability to peacefully share common family experiences, if possible, is always best for children of separating, divorced or divorcing parents. Just as during the relationship, it is equally important if not more so for children to spend time with each parent alone and also with both parents together.

This takes a lot of patience and willingness to look beyond the transgressions and problems of the past that led to the split-up and will allow your children to see the two of you together, able to interact and co-parent on an adult, mature and caring level. Children, after all, have two parents, and it is best for them to learn from their parents that even in the wake of a relationship that has ended, both of their parents are there for them and are able to treat each other with maturity and thoughtfulness. When we treat the other parent with civility and respect we send a powerful message to our children that will last them quite literally a lifetime.